I'm the worst.... I guess

Shit. I'm lower than worm. Lower than dirt. Lower than.... I don't know what else.

My parents, my grandparents and basically all of my family supported me to collect the funds for me to reach a good university. I was supposed to be excellent, scores high, someone to be proud of. Yet because of that, I became too lazy, not even trying to reach higher. I became addicted to games, anime and manga, while leaving my studies behind. I thought I would have no problem in my life at all. And so, I kept doing whatever I like, despite those warning from the people around me.

Well, that ends today. This isn't because I was told to change or anything (well actually I was), but it is because of my near-failure in this important junction of my life. I should have been able to enter one of the best university in Indonesia, ITB. However, I was too stubborn to study, and believe that I would surely be accepted even without studying. Because of that, now I failed that entrance exam. I thought of applying a scholarship to japan (monbukagakusho), yet I was slumped by my school report. My average was 76, lower that what was needed, 80. If only I tried harder.

Now I am feeling guilty to my mother, who are having a fight with her brothers and sister because of my failure.... I don't know what else to do... I feel so pathetic right now....

Well, I guess I still have one more chance. One more university exam for me, the NIFEE program from Shizuoka University. If I failed this, I really am the worst.

Here's my exam score, for reference. It's not that bad, it's just wasn't good enough:

First week of A Level Exam...

Yep, that's right. this is my first week doing the CIE A Level exam.

This week, I had English P2, Math P1 and Bio P2. Still easy I guess. The Math paper was fairly easy. The Biology paper, well let's just say I've got it under control. An A is still reachable, I guess. The English literature was tricky, especially with the word count thing. I'm a little afraid that my essay does not reach 600 words, but what the heck. As if missing a number of words gonna make me fail.... Oh well, at least I managed to have a good start, rite?

Oh, I forgot. Just now I received an e-mail from Shizuoka University. Turns out the entrance exam is going to be on 13th of June, which is a few days after my CIE. Well, no problem for me I guess, considering that I am a genius... ^^

P.S. I managed to put a self-made banner of myself. Umm... I think it's quite nice. Right? Right?

Intro... I guess?

Okay, this is the 3rd time I tried to create a blog. I hope this time I can really pull this through.

Anyway, I'm Emu, a.k.a. The Master Warlord.For those of you wondering, no, this is not my real name. This is an alias, a "Virtual Identity", as I like to call it. Of course, I have several of them. Sometimes I use the name Eliss, Aenkryll, and may more. To keep my anonymity, I can't tell my real gender, however when I play games I always use a female character. That's as far as I can tell.

However, all is not lost! The Great Master Warlord might not be able to disclose his/her characteristic details, but his/her journal is (most of the time) clear of lies! After all, Master Warlord is a gentle, cute, honest, genius, handsome, religious, etc, etc, etc.... wait, stop it with the rotten tomatoes! Can't you see I'm still here? Hey! Stop! Heeeeeeeyyyy...........

Well, jokes aside, I really am trying to be as honest as possible. So every post that I will write here *should* be exactly what I experience that day. As for the name, "War against Reality", it is actually totally self-explaining. This is the journal of my fight through life, so yeah. Well, see you all when I see you!